spare rib irish women's e mag

nua

2009-02-13T13:49:00.000-08:00

its a new year.

It has to be a good time because the tinsel is all safely packed away.

Its a time to think ahead, a time to plan new ventures.

So what can we do in these grim economic times?

Well it might be a good time to explore places near rather than far............maybe climb into an attic or cut price store and locate a tent, camping used to be fun........why not do it again.

Then there is local day tripping, have you really explored all the local beauty spots?

Local history, look up your own past and that of your community.

If you can still afford the phone bills, start a blog.

Write that novel, do that painting............really start that hobby you always meant to.

Most of all don't let the market forces grind you down. We are worth a lot more than the sum total of our credit.

Rediscover second hand shops, if you ever stopped.

Read books...........learn poems..............write them.

Join a social movement.

Above all don't let the economic depression become your depression..........maybe we had too much, and maybe it wasn't even fulfilling us.

enjoy the nua

Christmas again

2008-12-04T15:55:00.000-08:00

Well love or loathe it, its here again.

Personally I loathe it. However always being a party person i don;t mind everyone being happy and overspending, overeating and overdrinking for a while. Though that while seems to span November to February.

Its a bright light in the middle of winter. How can you hate it?

Well its not about hating it, its all the pressure on parents, families, mostly mothers, and the lonely. Not being a family person is part of my discomfort with it. On the other hand its a good time to meet up with old friends and take drastic action like going to another city just to see them.

Here in Ireland it is a monolith.

Two of my neighbours have already decked their houses out in Blacpool illuminations. Not being a party pooper i have strung some colourerd lights around the inside of my front door. To the outside world I am, game on, part of the buzz. They don't know that that is the sum total of my xmas decor.

I've sent about 15 cards. The rest lie in the kitchen, some of them are three years old now as I can't usually be bothered to sit down and write them. Especially now with e mail and facebook, we are all so much more in contact, cards seem a bit old fashioned.

I have a moody teenager aboard the my ship. She tuts at my half mast attempts and I savour the day when she will have her own place and not want to visit her aging mother and i can happily tackle a canvas sipping a cup of mulled wine and forget its even happening.

so happy x.ms to ye all.

facebook

2008-11-11T14:19:00.000-08:00

Its funny how intimidating a social networking site can be for the faint hearted.
Do you spend your time making new friends.........they might be jack the ripper.......or play with your mind.
Then there is the inevitable search for people you haven't talked to in years.......its fun finding them..but what then? Why did you lose touch in the first place? Do you really have anything to say to each other.
Their electronic reality makes you whince...........you might have a lot to say to them.........but then again maybe some things are best left unsaid!
If you are of a certain generation most of the people you invite to join really can't be bothered, why not just keep on e mailing one another? It was heard enough slog mastering e mail without taking on designing sites, updating your infornmation and so on.
The ego is a funny thing....once you have a Facebook page, its impossible not to log on almost daily to see what your tech savvy associates are up to.
Then of course there all those interesting groups you can join...........alternative politics is still alive and well and saturating Facebook.
Once a member you get all kinds of interesting updates on what is going on...albeit hundreds and even thousands of miles away.....so you can't attend.
Then there are those damaged relationships which go as far as remaking friends on Facebook with both parties too shy to make the first move.

Its a social phenomena.........exciting and scarey..............dip in the toe...........maybe some good will come of it.

Go Safe and not so Solo Irish Times Travel 11th October 2008

2008-10-14T06:58:00.000-07:00

It was with alarm that I read Roisin Sarohan's article 'The World at My Feet' in Go the Irish Times travel magazine on Saturday.

The article was inspiring, it was this that alarmed me.

Roisin, like many other female lone travellers, had a magical journey. I feel sure that young women all over Ireland will be looking to gap years, career breaks or their childless years to replicate such a trip.

Before reaching for an atlas or Lonely Planet guide I would urge them to stop. Think, plan and ensure that you are equipped in every way to take on the rigors of your destination.

What is necessary is detailed research of the areas you intend to visit. Not only the travel industries representations, but the actual newspapers and website news of the current levels of violence, rape and crime in the area.

The internet has made this possible.

It isn't possible to single out one place, though most would agree that a war zone is not a good bet. There are parts of the globe where lawlessness and violent crime are more prevalent. This information is harder to come by.

Governments place caveats on certain areas on their embassy and visa websites. Trip Advisor and other travel websites include actual traveller's experiences. For the most part travellers speak of positive experiences, these sites are less likely to feature negative ones.

Real information can be found on websites of local papers; which is fine if language is not a barrier. Translation is more possible with recent technology.

Local women's networks are a priceless source of information and advice. Communicate with women's organisations in your destination during your planning stage. Contact your own and other government's websites to get general advice on areas to avoid.

It would be wrong for me, or anyone, to say 'don't do it, its dangerous', as the evidence is that many women have successful and fulfilling experiences of travelling alone.

What is missing in the hard sell of the travel industry is the reality check.

My own experience was negative, to the extent that I have stopped travelling completely. My teenage daughter is planning to see as much of the world as possible. I won't say to her 'no, don't go', to do that would be akin to telling her not to get married because of a failed marriage.

What I will be telling her is the truth, its a beautiful world with a dangerous underbelly. That if the worst does happen that help, support and advice on recovery are rarities. That consullar support can be impossible to access and that a protective safety net is a myth.

When you Go Solo you take a risk, a huge risk, the 'world at your feet' can become your own world at your ankles.

I could warn travellers that Belize is a lawless destination where tourists are regularly ambushed at the borders with Guatemala. I could suggest that this is true of some other parts of the world. Yet, who would have thought that a young German traveller would have been murdered on her visit to Newgrange. Would she have found an indication anywhere that Drogheda was a dangerous place?

If I am saying anything useful at all on experiencing the beauty of this world, it is this - there is increased safety in organised travel in groups. There are many organised, team led, travel experiences available. There are also myriad volunteering and development agencies that can facilitate a first hand experience of being abroad.

If you are determined to go out there alone - plan it.

You can always change a plan should safe adventure come your way. Make sure that you know everything about the area before you go. Keep a constant link with home, so that abduction or disappearance is quickly evident. Spend serious money on accommodation, mobile technology, safe transport and planning.

Go out there and have fun - help and advice is just a click away.

Ed.

Home

2008-10-03T16:20:00.000-07:00

Home

Irish Women Writers

2008-09-16T13:33:00.000-07:00

www.writeon-irishgirls.com

Domestic Violence and Children

2008-05-23T11:04:00.000-07:00

What many women do not recognise is the effects of domestic violence on the children in the family. Even where the woman has tried to ensure that the children are not aware of the levels of violence or disharmony in her marital or co-habiting relationship, the children are affected.

Children will respond to domestic violence in different ways. Some children will be quiet, clingy or withdrawn, others will react by emulating the behaviour, becoming aggressive and loud, bullying and being disruptive.

Where children have been protected from the violence they will find it difficult to come to terms with their mother's need to escape from the situation. Women are caught between a rock and a hard place, they don't want to turn their children against their fathers, nor want them to develop a negative identification with their other parent.

Children need an explanation of what is happening, this needs to be age and ability appropriate. Firstly they need to understand that it is wrong to use violence, aggression, threats or bullying to get what you want. It is wrong to hit people. That their father was wrong to hit or abuse their mother. Not that he is a bad person but that his behaviour was wrong.

Most importantly, when the mother is to continue to be the primary carer, they need to understand that it is not their mother's fault that their father was violent. They need to know that their mother and other carers consider them to be important.

When a woman moves out of a violent relationship the whole family network may change, often there are financial and accommodation problems, this may also entail changing school, moving away from the familiar. Children will resent some of these changes, however if they fully understand what is going on, are fully involved in the changes it will be easier for them to accept.

While it is important to explain to children what is happening it is not necessarily good for children to hear all the details of the abuse. Its important to for the woman to talk through these details in a safe environment out of ear shot of the children.

Some children will have been directly involved in the abuse, witnessing it or intervening in it. In some cases the children will have been manipulated into participating in the abuse, and believing that their mother deserves to be treated badly. They may see the physical damage, bruising or broken limbs. They may overhear the sounds of the violence being perpetrated. Living in an atmosphere of violence, tension and fear will undoubtedly damage children. Children's sense of helplessness will be heightened if they see the person they depend on for protection being beaten and humiliated.

It is crucial to recognise their feelings, whether it be fear, upset, anger, disgust, anxiety, disappointment, loss, lonliness etc etc. Let them know that other children in the same situation feel the same. That it is OK to be scared, upset, angry, get them to name their feelings, to own them and to express them. They will act out their feelings, but with adequate reassurance, with acceptance and encouragement they will renew their resilience.

It will take patience as the children unlearn the behaviours of a violent, bullying or aggressive home life.......... but they will and they will move on to a peaceful and co-operative lifestyle if they are given the opportunity to express themselves and heal.

Polysexuality

2008-05-06T15:37:00.000-07:00

Polysexuality:
Juliet Mitchell's book 'Feminism and Psychoanalysis' draws feminists back to a re-reading of Freud. His work had been largely discredited by the wave of radical feminism which swept the boards in the 1980s. They argued that Freud had covered up incestuous abuse in order to protect respectable middle class Austrian families, that his theory was phallocentric, leaving women with 'a lack' (of the penis) and thereby suffering from penis envy.

What Mitchell asks us to do is to read Freud again and realize that his theories of the unconscious have been built upon by many leading psychoanalysts, Jones, Horney,et al. Melanie Klein's Objects Relations Theory, where the breast and not the penis is the arbiter of power, all built on Freud's psychoanalytic theory.

Mitchell talks of reading tradition against the grain in order to overcome the power imbalance between men and women, firstly by understanding its essence and thereby transcending its impact. She notes Lacan's work. Lacan theorizes that in language and knowledge that' phallus is the privileged signifier'. Also using psychoanalytic tools Lacan focuses on how the male predominates discourses. Obviously we know that women were not even allowed to attend Universities or take higher academic posts until the recent past, the language of poetry and cultural expression was the domain of the male. Lacan and Foucault both reach beyond traditional psychoanalytical discourses to theories on sexuality and gender.

Freud popularly theorized that the human is innately bisexual, he went further postulating that the infants sexual drives are not essentially gender lead at all, that all infants are polymorphously perverse. By this he meant that the infant would respond to stimuli from a multitude of sources.

Obviously at the oedipal stage the infants fall into line with their gender identity and sexuality following the example of their parents. However he has left us with an interesting take on sexuality per se. Sexuality is not related to gender, that once we extrapolate sexuality from male or female that we are left with a human who is capable of responding to a range of stimuli. The polysexual self. There is no otherness in this, gay or straight, mid way bisexual, these labels are dispensed with if we recognize that each human being has their own unique way of living out their sexual life, 'poly' as in many forms of sexuality - polysexuality.

rape

2008-05-04T17:30:00.000-07:00

Our local rape crisis centre is advertising for a therapist. Its a nervous time. Will they find someone willing to take on such demanding work?

For those on the waiting list it is all the more intriguing.

Waiting for a special someone who can take the strain of listening, hour upon hour,to undiluted pain.

We are all different. Some people have resources enough to bounce back. Some take it on the chin...........so to speak. For very many, recovery is a much slower process. It can depend on a mindset, your values, your self belief. It can depend on your sensitivity to a range of stimuli which reinforce the idea that rape is acceptable.

One woman recounts how her father, in his 80s, recently said, 'well, you didn't mind being raped by them other fellows you were with', he was saying out loud what many others believe. That rape is only about sex.

He was saying that the absolute violence and violation of rape is no different to a woman experiencing her own sensual and sexual pleasure. The 'whore' scenario. Once defiled in any way, the madonna deserves anything she gets. Why else do they concentrate so hard on a woman's sexual history when she takes the matter to court?

For many people the ongoing trauma of childhood sexual abuse manifests itself in drugs, drink, gambling, violence, myraid addictions and maladjustments to adult norms. The earlier the negative sexual experience the harder it is to overcome. For some, we are all different.

The daily stuggle to survive with constant triggers and reminders. the nightmares, the flashbacks, the silencing by 'respectable society' , force many into islolation, fear, phobia and depression. Anxiety becomes a constant companion, hypervigiliance the norm. Nothing is ever the same again.

To have been raped is to have suffered a fundamental loss, the loss of a sense of self. Loss of trust, loss of hope, loss of joy. In its place is fear, fear that it will happen again, fear that the mind will never recover.............which it won't without the listening ear of our therapuetic friend.

I do hope that they find someone soon for our small town, for your small village, for the girl in the next block, because it is essential to survival. it makes the difference between feeling suicidal and actually dying.

Bank Hoidays

2008-05-04T17:19:00.000-07:00

Here we are with an extra day off, a chance to catch up on jobs about the house and garden, the car or retail theraphy.............time with our loved ones. What about those who have no loved ones. Those stuck in unhappy d omestic circumstances, those parenting alone who are craving for adult conversation, those old and lonely, carers nursing those mentally and physically absent? For many people bank holidays are an additonal burden, another reminder of how empty life is for the truely alone.

I always notice an upsurge in calls from single women friends when its a bank holiday weekend. Everyone desperately searching for small comforts in an otherwise empty world.

We really do need to get our act together to improve the social scene for older women.

celtic tiger blues

2008-05-04T17:06:00.000-07:00

Irish Economy - Post Celtic Tiger

So what now, for post boom Ireland.

The manufacturing industry is relocating to Eastern Europe, the economic boom based on the constuction industy is over with the collapse of the property markets, unemployment is climbing steadily, EEC investment is going elsewhere, can it get any worse?

Well yes it could get worse, we could continue to have one of the highest levels of separation between rich and poor, become a slave society with gated cities defining who is 'in' and who is out. Something akin to South Africa, during aparthied. Except now the aparthied would be between the educated middle classes and the not working poor.

As Ireland begins to focus on finance sector work, Fund Management has become the new key word. Those in the know, the economists and venture capitalists are reeving up to the next boom in 'finance'.

In the mean time real wages are dropping,fast. Unemployment amongst the countries men folk, around one quarter of those newly registered as unemployed are from the construction sector, who are unlikely to have skills to move into Funds Management.

The Health Service is in total crisis with MRSA and other infections spreading in hospitals. The HSE froze all recruitment for 6 months in the last year. The Health Service Executive are now employing 'agency staff only' which means that they are paying twice the price per employee, whilst the employee has a 3 month contract, no benefits, such as sick pay, and overall the only ones who benefit from this strategy are the private sector agencies recruiting the staff.

So Ireland has grasped free market economics with zeal, the pay offs were there, fleetingly. for some. For the 800,000 long term unemployed very little changed in Celtic Tiger Ireland, for the newly unemployed the drop is painful, from 3500 a week as a bricklayer in Dublin last year to 200 social welfare.

As the emigrant ships turn in the quay, already over laden with Polish and eastern european migrant workers returning home to newly booming economies, Ireland prepares to weep. 'Richest country in Europe?' I think not, or not for long at all, a week maybe.

girlfriends

2008-05-02T17:48:00.000-07:00

www.girlfriendsmag.com/cover.html

lady list

2008-05-02T17:30:00.001-07:00

Welcome to The Lady List!
A new website dedicated to providing a FULL list of events for gay, lesbian, bi & transgender women in Ireland

From nights out to social groups happening around the country,
click LISTINGS.

Keep up to date with all things lesbian on the 'Lady Board' and more
in NEWS.

Inform us of events that you’ve heard of, or are organising, &
The Lady List will help spread the word. ADD EVENT

Check out the LINKS page for a huge range of great websites to visit.

And if you want to know more, have a look at ABOUT, or get in CONTACT.

lesbian site

2008-05-02T17:27:00.001-07:00

www.theladylist.ie/ -

the lady list

2008-05-02T17:25:00.001-07:00

RAG
are organising a feminist gathering to take place on the Mayday bank
holiday weekend in a rural setting in Leitrim. There will be workshops,
discussions, skill-sharing, music and fun.

Feminists of all
persuasions (and all genders!) are welcome to attend. Bring your
enthusiasm and ideas. We also hope to make the gathering an inclusive
space for children.

Costs will be kept to a minimum. Accomodation is camping, though we will help those with any special accomodation needs.

If you wish to attend, join the organising list asap to guarantee your space:

Send a blank email to: feministgathering-subscribe@yahoogroups.co.uk

(To Post message: feministgathering@yahoogroups.co.uk))

Any problems with that, or any questions before subscribing, just email us here ragdublin@riseup.net

Please forward this msg to anyone you think might be interested.

Solidarity
RAG

Health Service Workers

2008-05-02T17:07:00.000-07:00

So the Health Service in Ireland froze all recruitment for 6 months...................now it is employing agency staff on short term contracts. The services suffer from a constant staff changeover, the staff suffer from lack of job security and no basic benefits like sick pay...........the only ones really benefiting are the private sector employment agencies placing the staff with the HSE.

The agencies make double the workers salary. Many are based in the UK or are multi nationals like Berresford Blake Thomas.

Women's News

2008-05-02T17:05:00.000-07:00


	women's news is read by women throughout Ireland, Britain and further afield. WHY?

women's news
is produced by women living in Belfast and reports on groups and events throughout Ireland, on Irish women abroad and much more.

women's news
tells you what's new for women in Ireland and what their current concerns are.

women's news has great interviews of local women and international visitors.

women's news
is read because it is fun, entertaining and informative, because it is in touch with groups from all communities North and South, because groups want to find out about each other, locally and internationally, because Irish women need to know what the mainstream media does not tell them, because women round the world use it for research or just to keep in touch, and for millions of other reasons.

You can subscribe:
Write to: Subscriptions, women's news
30 Donegall Street, Belfast BT1 2GQ, N. Ireland
with a cheque or postal order
for the appropriate amount

Sub rates N.Ireland S. Ireland Europe Overseas
(1 year) & Britain

Unwaged £12.00 IR£14.00 £16.00
Ordinary £15.00 IR£18.00 £20.00 £24.00
Group or
support £20.00 IR£22.00 £24.00 £28.00
Institution £25.00 IR£30.00 £35.00 £40.00

You can order an introductory copy for 10% of prices quoted above.

If you live in Northern Ireland or the Republic of Ireland, you can buy a copy from your local newsagent or bookshop.

It is distributed by Easons and Menzies. If your local shop doesn't have it, ask them to order it.

In England, you can find it in feminist and radical bookshops. Some health food shops, women's centres and community groups sell it too.

Things to do for you...

2008-04-11T16:19:00.001-07:00

SugarRush @ Oslo Bar, Connolly Station, I.F.S.C
Launching on Saturday 12th April
Doors open at 10p.m.
Late bar and DJ.
Designated smoking area.
Male friends welcome

Kiss is on Saturday the 19th of April, DJ Sarah on the decks. So come along for a great nights craic and Party on!!!!!!!!!!

Doors open at 10.30

Kremlin is best known in Belfast, but there's a new one... juice
or lemon or something?!

Just incase you're interested a new club is opening this Saturday, 'SugarRush' at Oslo Bar, Connolly Station. Male friends welcome.

if you are in galway, check out the new gay bar/club Twirley's on
Shop Street, the club Eden at Twirley's runs from thurdays to
sundays , very friendly and relaxed fun place. the other gay bar in
galway is called The Stagedoor, friendly and relaxed place too, nice
for a drink or two, sometimes has a live band playing at the
weekend's.

Dublin has the usual places, I like The Front lounge, The George,of
course, well every know's there. The Dragon etc.
There are various women's club's on during the month, like Kiss for
example, check here for date's and venue's.

Madonna at GCN

2008-04-11T16:18:00.000-07:00

Madonna Exclusive!

COMMENTS (2)

We're well excited in GCN Towers with the news just confirmed that we have an exclusive interview with Madonna for the next issue! It's been a long time coming, but we know it will be worth it.

Launch of 50 Women

2008-04-08T14:53:00.000-07:00

A new network for 50+ women in the BMW area.

Yeah its a great name, BMW, Border, Midlands and West of Ireland. Some bright spark in Brussels or Dublin thought that one up. So under the National Development Plan we are living in the BMW area....wow.....sure a Mercedes would have been nice. Go Janis.

Anyway, as all the action for gay women in Ireland is in Cork, Belfast, Dublin and Galway.....quite a long way away, even for a BMW woman, we are setting up a local network.

Its quite grueling being a gay woman here, its either nightclubs full of twenty somethings or loneliness and islolation. One advert in Gay Community News and many replies later and we are doing our own thing.

We even have our own web page on www.moli.com 50 Women.

Looking to expand our ever increasing circle of women........................so get in touch. We are not a dating agency, not an activism group, only older women looking to have craic......fun, fun, fun is objective number one.

Spare Rib Ireland....are we ready to go again.

2008-03-14T18:30:00.000-07:00

Well i guess I will just have to get myself into academia if i want to talk to other feminists....there just don't seem to be too many lurking around the streets of Ireland at present.

I remember, when I was young, how we could talk about little else. Nowadays our heroines write for the Daily Mail and wear lipstick.......its not that i want to wear dungarees again, its just that smug middle class women sporting lipstick just doesn't do it for me, no matter how radical they were in their youth. Not that i mind a bit of lippo........few shades in the bathroom and all.

So why is it important............because patriarchy and sexism just seem to be getting worse and I am sick of hearing about 'how men are abused too'....reality is that women in Ireland are regularly beaten, raped and killed. That the majority of women earn only two thirds of the wage of men, look in your local FAS centre is you don't believe me.

Sure some women in USA/UK/Australia/ Japan/ wherever, have made it in the world of business and finance. Yes and some female politicians have raised 7 children, continued to look immaculate and focused on their careers. For Josephine Soap.... feck all has changed.

The rising tide of single parents is predominately female, the rising levels of child poverty are from single parent households....lets get real about where poverty has shifted to, who holds the burden and what the outcomes are.

So yes, it would be nice to talk to other feminists about our agendas, but i guess that for me it is impossible to take my gender out of my class relations. Not to hit middle class women over the head with it, poverty versus life of comfort, but because the agenda for dealing with poverty can't be forgotten or subsumed within a polemic that addresses only one part of the whole.

Spare Rib Feminist Magazine 1972-1996

2008-03-13T06:07:00.000-07:00

Like many women I missed Spare Rib when it closed its doors in the 1990s.

Sure Diva has taken over for young lesbians, the Pink Paper still reflects more male concerns, the thing that Spare Rib did was appeal to a lot of women across the board - activists.

What Spare Rib had, in one space, was representation of a diversity of women in the public sphere.

In the one place.

So you might be reading about Islam and feminism- turn a page- and young deaf lesbians, turn a page- and older womens networking; eco warriors, female rappers, parenting alone, disability, mental health, politics, trade unions, etc etc etc.

It made you feel like you were part of something, a movement if you like, albeit a disparate and disjointed one. It wasn't a place for conservative women, not really, though Bea Campbell's work on Tory Women, was fun and informative. It was a place to see what was going on. What the new debates were, who was organising what, and a central meeting place to get information on activism.

Yeah, so we are back to the right wing and liberal press, their representations of women, the objectification - like feminism didn't happen. It's so unfashionable.

Remember those 1970s outfits in granny's closet....how fashionable are they now......so too will feminism become de rigueur again.

So here we go, an on- line Spare Rib.....an Irish one at that, though it doesn't have to be.

Whilst feminist academics continue to bamboozle the majority of us with their 'paradigms'; how about a blog for women activists?

A blog for those who shave their legs and prefer men;
for those who love their fuzz and women too;
for those who ponder deeper recesses of sexuality;
for women of all abilities;
for adolescent women and octogenarians
.........for all of us;
menopausal, senile, breast feeding.........the mentally well, the slow to learn, the country girl, the city maid.......the celibate and the often laid.

A place to vent,
and let off steam,
a place to publish,
a queen serene,
a place for women,
in which to write,
what is bugging us,
in a blogging site.